For the past 11 months I have worked on Friday nights. It kind of puts a damper on the weekend when everyone else is excited about being home and enjoying the weekend and I am gearing up for a 12-hr night shift. I love my job but I am excited to be working Sunday nights now instead. So we had a normal Friday and Friday night yesterday!
Instead of sub-zero temps and snow like we have been having, we had 50 degrees and rain yesterday. I didn't complain ONE bit. It felt like summer. The boys and I went out to my parent's house in the morning because Hudson and Pa got a new train set for Christmas, that we are thankfully keeping there, and Hudson wanted me to see it. He had gone over with my dad a few days ago to play with it after my dad got it set up and was so excited to show me. It really is super cool but something that baby fingers would love the get a hold of.
|Hudson showing me and "gaga" aka Adam, my brother, the new trains|
|Pa playing with Hudson and Rhett|
After playing with Pa, we came home and Rhett took a super long 3+ hour nap. Hudson and I ate popcorn and watched "The Incredibles" for the first time, super cute. Then Hudson took a super long 4 hour nap and Rhett woke up. It will be the death of me to get them to nap at the same time. I think their naps overlapped by 30 minutes yesterday.
I started working on an "Ask me Anything" post yesterday. There are quite a few questions I have gotten about Janet, her service and then also about me and my family. If you have any questions you can email me (jmkbuett (at) gmail) or leave a comment. I am hoping to have it all compiled by tomorrow and to be able to answer some things that multiple people want to know all in one place. I love love love getting all of your emails and I have read each one and shared some of them with our family, I just haven't had time to sit down and respond to them all yet, but for those of you that have taken the time to email me or Jordan, thank you so much, we love reading your kind words.
So anyways, while I was working on the "Ask me Anything" post yesterday I had to pull up Janet's service video to find something out. Bryan had started his day with the video yesterday and I told him that my heart just can't bare to watch it yet, and I think that rings true for all of us. It is very hard to watch that video. So my goal was to quickly get to the section I needed and then get right off of it. But I ended up watching the part where she talks to us. I sobbed and sobbed for over an hour. My heart and soul just ached to hear her voice and to have her sitting with us again. Then I got out the letters that she wrote for the boys and the books. I stared at her handwriting. It was very shaky at the end but the letters are a precious treasure that I will always keep for my kids. I miss her greatly. It comes in waves. I was very broken yesterday but I am so glad to have the support of our friends. I texted Jordan and Maegan and told them that I was just sitting there crying. For some reason when I am sad it helps to talk to the other people that are just as sad. I am glad I have them in my life.
I finally composed myself, touched up my make up and we went and met Bryan and our friends, Lance and Natalie, and their two kids, for dinner at Gusanos Pizza. With Hudson and Rhett (3.5 and almost 1) we have our hands full, their kids are 8 weeks old and almost 2. We joked that it would be possible with the age spacing that all four kids could belong to one family... they all did really well but after about an hour of being there mass chaos ensued and every child was being held by a parent, ha! We decided that next time we will do take out!
|oh I love them so|
I realized as we were getting ready to go eat that one of the last times we went to Gusanos was with Janet. I remembered that I took a picture of her and Hudson that day. I just pulled it up and it took my breath away. We were sitting at the very same table last night as the last time that we were there with Janet. I think maybe it is God's way of tell me that she is still with us in Spirit, especially after I was so sad last night.
|June 6, 2012 taken from THIS post|
I wore Janet's red hat again last night. I love it because it reminds me of her. It makes me less sad. So if you see me in it, know I might be having a rough day or I might just be trying to remember to be intentional and carry on her legacy.
We headed home after dinner, Tony came and picked up Hudson to spend the night and David and Jordan came over for a little while. Bryan and I watched a movie and dealt with a very fussy teething and congested baby boy who was up WAY past his bedtime.
I am heading to lunch with my best friends today, that's always a mood-lifter.
"This is the day that the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it."
You can't experience such deep grief without there having been a deep, valuable relationship that was lost. It's a tribute to her imprint on your life that you see her and miss her in so many ways. Some families only get together a few times a year, if that. You are so blessed to have had someone so involved in your life and in your childrens' lives. I'm sorry for your hurt but so grateful that you had an amazing mother-in-law. *hugs* HeatherReplyDelete
Bless your ❤!!!ReplyDelete
Would you mind listing the songs and artists that were included in Janet's service? Our church isn't very contemporary with our music and I am
not around that music much anymore. I would love to download some of it as I enjoyed hearing it on te video. Thanks!
Hi Jenna! I loved reading Janet's blog, even though I never knew her in real life she touched me so deeply.ReplyDelete
I have two questions for your "ask me anything" post.
1) What do you do?
2) How many children/grandchildren does Janet have? I was always confused reading her blog because it seems like there were so many haha. But I know she and Tony had a "blended family" so maybe that's why!