May 12, 2016

We Are Never Having Fun Again.



My five year old just yelled at me "I am never listening to you again".

My five year old, Hudson, is well mannered, well behaved, he doesn't make bad choices very often. My three year old on the other hand... well that's a story for another day.

We are in a phase of life right now with Hudson where he is having to learn the consequences of his actions. Man, that's rough. You make a bad choice, don't listen to mommy... you don't get a privilege. Bummer.

...enter the whole "I am never listening to you again" since not listening to me was what got him in this predicament in the first place, I am thinking maybe he should reevaluate his strategy, but whatevs.

In the midst of our battle of the wills today, I found myself in a place no mother wants to see herself in. The words "We are never having fun again" came out of my mouth.

I try to unplug and take my boys to do something fun towards the end of the week that's out of the norm. It usually involves spending a pretty penny to go to a fancy jump place with friends so they can run out their energy and have some fun. Today we did said "jump" place. We took Hudson's friend with us, she went with us to the natural foods store after, and then we met her mom for lunch. And my boys were crazy and didn't listen to a word that I said which led to a consequence of not getting to see Pa like they wanted and going home to take naps instead. Which to a 5 year old equates the worst thing imaginable and an epic meltdown in the car.

...which led me to "We are never having fun again". Because I have found that this tends to happen when we get out of our routine and I do something that in my mind will be SO fun for them, and then it backfires and everyone misbehaves and leaves mom miserable and needing medication or a large chocolate chip cookie at noon... or so I have heard, from a friend. ;)

Now that the situation has diffused and everyone is sleeping quietly in their beds. I've had time to reflect. Yesterday I prayed these exact words in my prayer journal "Please help me to be a kind and patient mother to my children, not quick to snap or anger". Yeah, pretty sure "We are never having fun again" doesn't falling into me being a kind/patient mother who isn't quick to snap or anger.

...so maybe today's lesson wasn't just for Hudson. It was for me too. Funny how God takes life events and turns them into teaching moments. I feel like this has happened a lot since becoming a mother. I see things in Hudson that are quality traits of mine that I love, and some that I wish he wouldn't have inherited- like the one where we feel like the world is going to end if everything doesn't go according to the plan we have in our heads. But I also know that we have a Father who refines us and makes us into who we are meant to be and the qualities that we have, we have for a reason.

So I went into Hudson's room, and asked him if he knew why he was in trouble. (Always important to make sure that's understood because I'm pretty sure half of the time Rhett has no idea why he's in trouble because he basically lives to be disciplined.) He did. He knew why he got that consequence and we sat on the floor together and talked. I told him that Mommy made a bad choice by telling him we would never have fun again and asked for his forgiveness. Such a humbling act. Thankfully kids are pretty forgiving, and I am also glad that our memories are foggy from when we are little. My mom has told me that she would sometimes pray at night that we wouldn't remember parts of the day, and thankfully I don't ever remember her ever snapping or getting mad at us when we were little, so either she never did or I guess it worked, and even though Hudson may not remember this lesson, Mommy will. Motherhood is rough, but it's so worth it. So again today my prayer is the same. I know the Lord is refining me to be the exact mother my boys need, and I pray the same for you, and that you know you're the exact mother your children need.

Happy Thursday.


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